Missed

Missed are times of peace

Times of solemness

Laughter and carelessness

Running rampant through the wood at home

 

Missed are days of youth In all their greatness

Excitement of the minds

Sneaking carefully through the undershrub

 

Missed are seconds of happiness

That needed no intelligence

No cause of why

Smiling loudly on the banks of the river

 

Missed are moments of truce

Between anxiety and calm

All the things that must be done

Sitting hunched under piles of worry

 

Missed is childhood

Blessed times

This is an elegy

Moaning the death of time

A Rabbit (Want of Nothing but a Home)

Rustling

Bustling

Through the corners

This small world

Around me

 

Very tightly

I hear all sounds

Like I would be their maker

 

A killer

By heart

Lives in my soul

Don’t come near me

Unless you will feed me

 

If you look at me closely

You see the symbolic never-ending circle

I cannot be caught

 

With black thoughts I go through life

Missing no one

Wanting nothing

But a home

At the end of the day, it isn’t where I came from. Maybe home is somewhere I’m going and never have been before.

— Warsan Shire

Perhaps home is not a place but simply an irrevocable condition.

— James Baldwin, Giovanni’s Room

I Miss My Grandma

I miss my Grandma something fierce.
There is an ache in my chest that will not disappear.
I wish to call her on the phone.
I ask everybody her number.
I wish to talk to her about nothing and everything.
I couldn’t catch her.
It is hard to do so.
Time difference seven hours.
How I realised now I miss her,
When I visited her last year?
She is getting old,
A surgery after another.
Her recovery is quick,
But her happiness is something else.
I spoke with mom and dad today,
Because they also live in another country,
Now I miss them too.
But dad said that when he was coming home,
Grandma became depressed.
I don’t want Grandma to be sad,
I want her to be glad.
I want to hug her and tell her I love her,
And that I miss Papa too.
It is hard to live with heartache,
And missing,
In the middle of the night.

This is for you, Grandma in Texas, so far away, but yet near in my heart. I want to be there with you.